Hyper Smash

Tuesday, March 29, 2011


Car Salesmen and Neckties


Would You Buy A Car From This Guy
You cannot always trust a man wearing a necktie.

Car Salesmen are synonymous with neckties. If you visit a car dealership you'll spot the sales rep by the car salesman tie.  They are usually, very distinctly dressed to impress with at times very nice neckties and sometimes out right ugly ties. If the car salesman necktie is a Versace or Armani then he is a real hustler and makes big bank at the dealership. If he is wearing a novelty tie then he may be a goofy guy that will get you into a bad car or he may be wearing that silly tie as a ruse and he may as dangerous or worse then the styling guy with the expensive tie. If the salesman is wearing a modest tie than he may the most trust worthy however do not be fooled - these guys, all of them no matter what tie they wear are out to accomplish one thing. They're job is to get as much money out of you for as little car as possible.


Are all car salesmen sharks? Yes. For two years I sold neckties to Southern California car salesman out of the trunk of a 1966 Lincoln Continental. I had some interesting times and no doubt I learned how to sell ties. Getting the attention of a dozen or so mooches ( slang for greedy car salesmen ) and selling them anything is no easy task. They have a special word for a person who gives in and signs the deal on a car, a "lay down." As if the opponent just gives up and surrenders just like a couple of guys wrestling. There are many traps that you can fall into when buying a car that will result in your paying much more than necessary. For instance the life time wax simonize package that will run you about $800 to $1500 that only costs the dealership about $20 including the labor of the poor guy executing the application.

Slick Car Salesman Wearing a Tie
The car salesman is part of a team and he will pass you over to a sales manager, a closer and a finance guy and everyone one of those guys is hammering you all the while looking so good and so respectable wearing a necktie.

Now concerning those hardened warriors that sell, sell, sell, they also buy, buy, buy.  Just like a house wife with a credit card at a Macy's sale, car salesmen buy neckties and "lay down."  I must have offered a thousand jobs over those two years to sell cars by General Sales Managers but I was hardly performing magic.  I could sell ties to car salesmen like they were a matter of life and death with almost no effort.

Would You Buy a Car From This Man
This brings me to two things that I'm reminded of here.  "Would you buy a car from this man." which is about Richard Nixon and selling cars. The other is how one car salesman explained what he was going to tell his wife when he got home that night with a half a dozen new ties I had just sold him.  The Richard Nixon tie reference is visual - you may remember it if you were born in the 50's or earlier.  The other is as follows.

  “…..we’ve got bills to pay, she’s always complaining,” he said. “Baby, I’m gonna look reeeeeeeaaaaaaal good when I do it,”

Najee Hasan, sales and leasing agent at Cerritos Dodge, California exclaiming what he tells his wife when she complains about him coming home with more ties when there are bills he should be paying.

The One and Only Richard Milhouse Nixon - He Would have Made a Really Great Car Salesman